December 15. Predicted due date. I’m not a believer in due dates, they’re only a random prediction but, I did wake up this morning feeling a little like - what is Santa going to bring me? A little beige package of love? I’ve been very patient these 40 weeks but I’m beginning to wonder what Mark and I made and what he’s going to look like. I think I’m a little afraid of all the emotion I’m going to feel. For once in my life. I just know I’m going to lose it. I made a person with a wonderful man, who is my heart.

I thought I’d keep up this blog a little better, the goings on of a prego woman. I’m lazy, or didn’t want to bore anyone with ANOTHER tale of a pregnant woman’s experience. Who cares? Millions of people do this everyday. Curious family members and friends have kept up with me as they please and it’s been pretty boring (thankfully). I’ve felt pretty normal this whole time. I never got sick, I didn’t gain the predicted Dr weight, I haven’t collected a stretch mark, kept my bitching to a minimum and nothings even swollen. Well, besides the basketball in my shirt. That’s the only place I’ve really gained weight. Maybe that’s why I didn’t blog. If there’s nothing to bitch about does anyone want to read it nowadays? I’m not a bragger. So here it is - I’ve had a perfectly sane pregnancy and I’m proud. I could do it for another couple months… I told Mark it keeps me honest. Ha. I should rent out my uterus for some extra cash.

We finally got our shit together about a month ago. So finally the house looks like someone’s about to bear child, not like we robbed a babies r us and have random loot lying around. Ikea furniture built. Closets cleaned out. Baby gifts organized, washed, put away. We filled in the holes of things we needed with a Target gift card extravaganza and discovered the world of used baby stores. GENIUS. There’s still a few things to finish but when I realized that baby would be living in our bedroom for the first few months, I gave up. Or got lazy, again.

I think I’ve avoided the giggly excitement because I know the real work lies ahead. I’m a realist, to a fault. I’m no good without sleep and I’m afraid of the head I’m going to chop off in the process of learning and living. Well, I know, and I don’t want it to happen. There’s also the evil cloud of money issues always looming overhead. We still haven’t completely decided or figured out what we’re going to do for childcare when I have to go back to work. I just have to believe everything will work out, and it will. I’m going to appreciate all we have. Things always work out. For now, the curiosity will build until our little man shows up. I’m allowing myself to finally be excited while still remaining patient. I’m going to go home tonight and love on my man and give those little black animals a lot of attention. Tito and Martin are going to have a little brother soon… and we’re going to be parents. Who would’ve guessed, the wild whiskey rocker and the ladies man on the Vespa would get together and start a family? I did…